THE FOLLOWING IS A LIE, A VICIOUS LIE:
I have had starring roles in many failed CBC sitcoms. In one I played a fast talking foul mouthed card shark that would set up shop in a different neighbourhood each week. My role consisted mostly of yelling profanities at old ladies and stealing money from their purses. We were not picked up.
In another I played a street tough prostitute named Dan. My character would spend his days dreaming about his nights and his nights dreaming about his days. The show was confusing and was not picked up.
I've also played the son of an alcoholic daycare worker. My character would sit around and eat digestible crackers all day. In the pilot episode I creatively hooked some babies up to strings and gave my drunk mother a puppet show. She laughed, and she laughed. The show did get picked up but was retooled into DaVinci's Inquest and my character was mercilessly dropped.
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